Or Vanpool Ho, whichever you find most fitting.
Apropos of nothing, I love what happens when you dick around with commas. Like this:
At the beginning of the kindergarten year for C I had to give up being a member of my vanpool.
This was a Really Big Deal to me, because A) I have a 45 mile commute EACH WAY to work and B) I'm always broke. I drive a moderately small SUV that on its best day gets 25 miles to the gallon. I end up filling it about three times a week. And I did the math on that and I about choked on my coffee and then I started to cry because apparently I spend about $7,000 on gas a year.
That's one hell of a chunk of change. No choice in the matter, though, becaseu my son was not coping in kindergarten, and for the entire first semester I was being asked to come get him from school at least twice a week. This was before his IEP team was in place, and he had a teacher who had zero experience with children like mine. It was frustrating, to say the least, and for not the first time in my short parenting career I blazed with resentment because my ex NEVER leaves work to get the kids when they're having a problem. Because HIS job doesn't let you leave (WTF kind of employer doesn't "let" you leave work if your child is having an emergency? ) and you know, HIS job is WAY more important than MINE. WHATEVER. So I had to give up my car pool to the tune of seven THOUSAND dollars a year because my ex, who WORKS IN TOWN can't pick up his own kids from school.
Not that I'm complaining or anything. Because it hasn't been one of the more financially painful things I've had to deal with since this divorce, no, NOT AT ALL. (This is one of the days where the sarcasm font would come in handy)
Things have long since settled down at school, and I could have been in the van pool - but I gave up my seat, and someone else filled it, and the attrition rate around here is something like frozen molasses creeping uphill at midnight in January. Nobody gives up vanpool seats. They are as rare and valuable as William Shakespeare's signature.
But yesterday the clouds dissipated, the stars and planets aligned, and angels sang. One of my former commuters is going to move to the other side of the state. Her husband is getting a promotion at work that will take them over to the place where there are big green trees, lots and lots of water (most of it falling from the sky) and moss grows on the north side of everyone including the people. And her seat in the vanpool is up for grabs.
MINE. MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE.
All mine.
More comma fun:
Image: http://greaterthanlapsed.tumblr.com/post/10340315471/aundressa-weexist-weresist-ejob